Yeah, I started reading some of the relevant articles online recently when I was considering negotiation. I hadn't thought about this question at all before. Something that just occurred to me though (and this is completely unfounded, just a thought): I wonder if this is sort of like management? How women don't necessarily do well when they try to just adopt men's managerial tactics outright, but can manage quite well when given the same goals ("get these people under you to produce", or whatever) and allowed to do that their own way? The ordering around vs. relational thing.

Now, I know part of women's hesitation to negotiate is that relational thing. So maybe this doesn't hold at all. But I wonder if there are better and worse ways for any particular individual to negotiate, given their preferred ways of dealing/working with people.